Through the looking glass, I’m doing all the things I’m supposed to do to be successful. But here’s the thing: nothing is guaranteed.

Success? It’s a moving target.
Internally defined. Externally distorted.

Sure, I’d love to weigh 192 pounds, run five miles a day, and get paid to do something meaningful. But even if I get there, won’t there be more? A new level? A new itch?

I was listening to David Goggins the other day. His philosophy?
“I am a piece of shit.”

Now, that might sound harsh—but it’s a mindset shift.
When you accept that you’re a piece of shit, you strip away the ego. And once that’s gone, you’re free to not be one.

But how?

You follow the suck.
You do what sucks and keep doing it.
Because in the suck… that’s where the real growth lives.

The Suck List

So let’s get tactical: enter The Suck List.

Start writing down the things that suck for you. Not for everyone, just for you. These are the actions that, if done consistently, would lead to a new version of yourself. You already know them. They’re the things you keep avoiding. The things you justify skipping.

As I sit here writing this in a café, I flipped back to a journal entry where I admitted how lonely I’ve been feeling. You know what would suck right now?

Walking up to someone’s table and starting a conversation.

Why does that suck?
Because I’m an introvert.
Because that kind of thing makes me uncomfortable.
Because my brain screams, “Don’t do that.”

But honestly? That’s what a piece of shit says.
Ha.

The suck list works because it’s yours. And it needs two factors:

  1. Suck Level – how hard or uncomfortable it is to do
  2. Life Impact – how much it could move the needle in your life

Here’s the twist:

The suckier it is, the more power it usually holds.

Implementing the Suck

Once the list is built, it’s time to plan. You have to define how much suck you’re ready to embrace. For me, there are a few sucky things I’ve already leaned into—working out, journaling, staying accountable. But there’s a lot I still avoid.

The key?
Do it anyway. Especially when you don’t feel like it.

Growth lives in the suck.
You are your own experiment.
You’re the petri dish and the scientist.

Explore yourself. Push yourself. Study yourself.

There are plenty of people out there who are already doing this. But there are also a lot who aren’t.

That means just by starting, you put yourself in the rare space—

The space of action.
The space beyond excuse.
The space beyond limitation.

Start your suck list.
Rank it.
Do it.
Become something else.